It’s a painful experience to be deeply connected with a man, only to find him pulling away and losing interest.
Have you ever been with a man who seemed to really like you, only to begin distancing himself and saying he really wasn’t ready for a commitment?
Why is it that he ends up marrying the next woman he dates? Was he lying when he said he wasn’t ready for a commitment?
The answer comes down to deep emotional attraction.
In all likelihood, he was not lying when he said he wasn’t ready for a commitment. In fact, unlike women, a man’s default mode is that he is not ready for (or even looking for) a commitment.
It takes a special kind of deep emotional attraction for a man to feel compelled to keep a woman in his life with a shared promise of committed intentions for the future.
What creates that intense emotional bond for men?
We can tell you one thing for certain. Men experience relationships for what they are here and now, in the present moment.
This is a stereotype, but because there is so much truth in it you would be foolish to ignore its implications for your relationship.
Research with men and women in the early stages of dating relationships has shown that women typically consider themselves to be “in a relationship” by the time the third date rolls around.
In contrast, men do not consider themselves to be “in a relationship” until several months of exclusive dating have occurred.
Even when he’s exclusively dating one woman, a man will be surprised when his counterpart suggests the relationship is exclusive. Why is that?
Again, it comes back to the fact that men tend to spend less time plotting and planning the course of their lives in terms of relationships. Men do not define their lives (as much) by where things seem to be going in a relationship.
For your man to reach a point where he desires a committed relationship, something very significant must occur first.
He must experience an intense emotional attraction that causes him to feel less alive when he is not in your presence.